As both a makeup artist and hair stylist for brides and their mothers and as a mother to both a bride and a few grooms, I can tell you that the mother of the bride shares a special place in the pantheon of the needy.While grooms are pretty much low maintenance; shower and shave 'em and put them in a suit and they are basically ready to go. OK, I'll admit it - I've slathered on a bit of mouse on many a groom's hair to make them feel 'pampered'. But let's be honest, as long as they show up and say 'Ha'rey aht…", place a ring on the bride's finger and break a glass, oh and smile pretty for some pictures – they have pretty much done their duty. Mothers of the groom may be nervous and a little anxious, but they do not endure the hours upon hours upon hours of preparation the Mother of the Bride endures as she watches the metamorphosis of her daughter into the BRIDE.
Truthfully this painful process of 'becoming a bride' really begins with three innocent words spoken by the happy couple: "We're getting married". From that fateful moment and until the happy couple stand under the chuppah, there is a mad dash to complete something like one thousand, six hundred and twenty two tasks. Each task is a search for sheer perfection – for the wedding, as a whole and for the bride, personally. The task search list includes: the perfect hall, the perfect menu, the perfect center pieces, the perfect chuppah, the perfect rabbi, the perfect band, the perfect photographer; as well as the perfect bridal gown, the prefect bouquet, the perfect veil, the perfect tiara, the perfect jewelry, the perfect shoes, the perfect makeup, the perfect hairstyle and the list just goes on and on. As time draws closer to the event, this never-ending list is tackled by an ever-more anxious bride and her ever-more apprehensive mother.Let's take "The Hunt for the PERFECT Bridal Dress " as a classic example. The search for the perfect bridal dress can span cities, countries, continents. The tears shed during this search could fill oceans. It's a wonder why we mothers haven't gotten together and decided that the wedding dress search should begin when the "bride" is three years old. This gives us plenty of time to search in a more leisurely fashion.
But somehow in this mad dash for perfection, the Mother of the Bride is forgotten. You may rightly say that this is the bride's day, so tough luck; the mother had her day and now it's her daughter's turn. Fair enough, but I believe that the mother of the bride deserves a little special attention of her own. It's an emotional day for the bride's mother as she sees her daughter become a bride, especially if this is her first wedding or first daughter marrying or only daughter marrying. Sometimes all three conditions are found in one wedding event.On the day of the wedding, as the long hours of preparation move forward and the bride is made up, hair-styled, dressed, attended to and fussed over – hopefully with her friends surrounding her; the mother of the bride is often left behind to watch with a cup of coffee in one hand and a set of car keys in the other hand.
What am I asking for? I am asking that the mother of the bride get a little pampering on this special day and that someone ELSE remember to pamper her. Need some pampering ideas? How about an early morning massage at home or in the hotel, or full makeup, hair styling and nails for the big event? And you know what else she deserves? A present – yup - a present for the Mother of the Bride. Presented either by the bride or the Father of the Bride (I'm sure he is there somewhere, although you really don't seem to notice him until the badekin or the chuppah).
I believe that jewelry is the perfect present! And wouldn't it be lovely if it could be something the Mother of the Bride can wear to the wedding and enjoy immediately? What kind of jewelry? Now that's the subject of a whole other blog!Remember to kiss the Mother of the Bride – today!
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