A white wedding confection of layers and layers of lace and taffeta may be tempting (to some), but does it match your chasan? What I really mean to say is does your wedding dress match your wedding style? Let me illustrate. When we were planning my daughter's wedding (two years plus one granddaughter ago – I am proud to say), she had her heart set on a dress similar to the one I wore at my wedding in 1978 (suddenly that sounds soooo long ago). It's scary, no terrifying, to think that my gown is now sold on ebay under the description: "vintage". In any case, my daughter had her heart set on this 'vintage' style – you know: long simple gown with lace at the wrists and a lace heart insert on the bust area. We found a very similar dress on ebay and bought it for less than a hundred dollars.
We figured that even if she decided not to wear it, we would 'only be out' less than a hundred bucks and in the midst of a wedding production, what's a hundred bucks?
We received the dress and she loved it. We had it dry-cleaned. And then she had an epiphany. The dress did not match her chasan. A lovely Morrocan boy from the south (of Israel, not Georgia or Texas, or the South Bronx, for that matter). The dress did not match the style of the wedding. The wedding was the usual mixture of Ashkenazi, Sepharadi, Israeli, American, European (ok, even a few Canadians), religious and non-religious.
While it is true that a wedding dress can 'stand alone' in its fashion statement. It can be way, way out there in style, while the rest of the wedding and the wedding guests are fairly 'traditional'. It's done every day in Israel. But, as in many other areas of life, because people do it, it doesn’t necessarily mean it's a good thing.
Moral of this story: I recommend you think about your overall wedding style, your lifestyles and venue; before you go for the 'country look' at a super formal venue, three-inch stilettos at a beach front venue and a 'wedding cake' dress that can barely fit through the doors of a small, intimate venue.
I would not use the "c" word (that's "comfort" for the innocent) while discussing wedding apparel. But I would suggest bringing a pair of flats to change into after the chuppah. Or you may end up going barefoot, like I did throughout my own wedding and come to think of it, my daughter's wedding.
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