The ultimate guide to bat mitzvah & bridesmaids hairstyling

Photo credit: www.pixabay.com

Hairstyling for bat mitzvah girls, young bridesmaids and flower girls is a wonderful way to create a special look for these little cuties. 

Photo credit: www.pixabay.com

The age-appropriateness of the hairstyle, the young lady’s level of maturity and temperament and length of hair - all together -determine whether you should invest the time and effort in styling the bat mitzvah/bridesmaid's hair.  

While even infants can wear a cute headband; once these cuties can walk on their own, you can begin to think about styling their hair, just keep these guidelines in mind:

Let the young lady pick the hairstyle or at least have a say in what she wants – within reason.

Go with the flow - don’t make the hairstyling process feel like a punishment.

Be open to the fact that young girls may not want any style on the big day or will remove the hairstyle just before the simcha, or while walking down the aisle or exactly at the moment the photographer is about to take a photo.

 The hairstyle must suit the face and body build of the young lady.

Plan a style that can be easily undone or pinned up if it falls or the young lady no longer wants to wear it.

Any length of hair can styled.  Even short hair can be styled with simple braids or hair coils, using colorful rubber bands or clips to hold the ends in place.

Photo credit: www.pixabay.com

Never create top-heavy or bottom-heavy hairstyles or styles that pull the hair back too severely.

Make sure they can jump, dance and move freely in their style.  I always do the jump up and down test to ensure no hairs can get caught in zippers or sleeves.

Braids, simple or complicated, are always in style for bridesmaids of all ages.

Photo credit: www.pixabay.com

A gentle sprinkle of glitter (make sure our cutie closes her eyes and then give the hair a light dusting of hairspray and then gently sprinkle on glitter, then blow off the excess) is a great way to add a bit of sparkle to a simple style without the fuss of pins, especially for young bridesmaids.

The most versatile hairstyle for nearly any length of hair is a half up and half down hairstyle and has the added value of keeping the young lady’s hair from falling all over her face.               

Flowers, pins and other hair accessories – can be an easy way to dress up a simple style or can be a pain if they fall out or stick someone.  Look for hair accessories that are easy to attach and stay put or consider gluing (with special glue) flat accessories to the hair! 

Photo credit: www.pixabay.com

Do you have an upcoming simcha and want to have your little cutie’s hair styled?  Take a look at my Gallery of Dreams on my website. Now contact me today for a free consultation!

Did you enjoy my article?  I’d love to hear from you!  Drop me a line or tell me on my facebook page and please feel free to share my blog with a bride and all your friends!

Do you have any questions about Jewish wedding customs, please drop me a line?  Do you want to learn more about brides, weddings and beauty? Please subscribe to my blog. 

How can I look like on a celeb on the red carpet?

I always talk about finding beauty inspiration from celebrity looks.  The problem is that when some women look at photos of these celebrities at red carpet events, many times they say to themselves they will never look ‘like them’ - so why try? 

Wrong approach!  When you look at photos of celebrities, you are looking at the result of tens of woman (and man) -hours of work.  Professional teams of stylists, makeup artists and hairstylists collectively work on these women to produce these results and the final photos are carefully choreographed frozen moments in time.

Inspiration does not mean imitating a head-to-toe look; it means taking a touch, a sparkle or an item from the look and making it your own.

 Photo Credit: Mark Sebastian  https://www.flickr.com/photos/markjsebastian/

When you look at celebrity looks I want you to keep in mind:

Celebrities know pain and know how to smile through the pain!  Do not think for a moment that every woman on the red carpet is breathing freely and standing comfortably in their magnificent dresses.  Don’t confuse revealing and sexy gowns with comfort; every move is a dance with near disaster!  They are stitched, taped, corseted, bound and caged into their dresses.  If they didn't smile and look beautiful and graceful for their red carpet moments, their friends at Versace, Gucci, Givenchy, Zuhair Murad, Zac Posen or whomever would never lend them a gown again. 

And while we are on the subject of shoes (we were?), a recent American Medical Association study has shown that only one in one hundred thousand females come out of the birth canal wearing stilettos.  Have you taken a look at the height of red carpet shoes?  It’s true, every woman’s legs do look longer and sexier in high, high heels.  And what about that slow sexy walk?  That’s because stilettos only have one speed: slow and steady and preferably on the arm of someone who can help you walk down the red carpet without falling all the time (I still don’t know how they prevent nose bleeds). 

Now let’s talk about makeup and hair.  Every woman should know by now that the “more natural the look”, the more makeup is used!  The camera lens, especially in today’s world of HD is unforgiving; the makeup must not only be truly perfect but it must hold up to all the hot lights.  The best method to ensure the makeup is anchored is by applying layers of base and powder.  There are no short cuts here.  More truly is more.  And for the record no they don’t touch their faces, rub their eyes or lick their lips from the moment the makeup is cemented on and until it is peeled off hours later!

Today’s hairstyle trends favor the nearly messy, almost wavy, sort-of braided looks.  But don’t let the just-got-out-of-bed, tousled look fool you; there’s a whole lot of extensions, weaves and teasing going on, not to mention to the cans of hair spray and hair product needed to get and hold that “perfect” look.

There’s also another secret to celebrity frozen moments in time and that is celebrities know their best angles for photographs.  They know exactly how to hold their heads, where to put their hands and how to “breathe in” so the posed pictures are nearly “picture perfect and so life-like”.  The Hollywood machine, along with the hordes of actors and actresses, dress and jewelry designers, the stylists and the entire beauty industry is fed through these frozen moments in time.  Every picture must and will be perfect picture to ensure the best return on investment.

So ladies we should not use their photos as a flight map to how we must look, but rather use their photos as a reference point on the map to how we can look when we choose to.

Did you enjoy my article?  I’d love to hear from you!  Drop me a line or tell me on my facebook page and please feel free to share my blog with a bride and all your friends!

Do you have any questions about Jewish wedding customs, please drop me a line?  Do you want to learn more about brides, weddings and beauty? Please subscribe to my blog. 

The Myth of “I Never Wear Makeup”

“What kind of makeup look would you like to wear at the wedding?”

Through the years I have asked countless mothers of the bride and the groom this question and many times I have heard in response: “Oh, I never wear makeup, so whatever…”.  Wrong answer!  

I am here to stand up and say out loud that there are definitely times when every woman must wear makeup and a wedding is one of those times!

Go ahead and pamper yourself!

To say that every bride should wear makeup is a given; no matter how young, sweet and dewy-faced,  the bride needs to wear some makeup.  The facts are simple: the bride is (usually) decked out in a white dress and, at least for the first few hours, is surrounded by a white veil.  Many times even her flowers are white.  That all-white look alone can create a pale and washed-out appearance.

Now take into account the lovely brides who fast on the day of their weddings, the brides who are hyper-sensitive, the ones who are hyper-worried and the ones who are just incredibly nervous.  In most cases the veritable grocery list of wedding circumstances will conspire to produce a pale, washed-out look on any face.  The bride MUST wear makeup – at least a good warm base, a warm or pinkish blush and some lip and eye treatment and a lick of mascara. 

But this article is directed at all the other women of the bridal party, especially the MOTHERS of the BRIDE and the GROOM.

Makeup - lovely makeup!

I don't care if you NEVER wear makeup, I don't care if you didn't wear makeup for your own wedding and I don't care if you didn't wear makeup for your other sons'/daughters' weddings.  It is equally unimportant to me that the wedding is scheduled for the summer/winter rain/snow storm/midnight or noon; on a beach, on a mountain or in an over air-conditioned venue.  The mothers of the bride and groom MUST WEAR MAKEUP.  If you are curious, yes this is written in stone!

Let me explain why:  You must wear makeup for the sake of the symmetry of the wedding pictures.  ‘Symmetry’ you say?  Imagine a photograph showing half the people are wearing only white clothes head to foot and the other half are wearing clothing of all the colors of the rainbow.  The photo will look "off" - something will be not quite right - half the picture will look "alive" and the other half will look washed out.  

It's the same with makeup.  No matter what outfit and hairstyle a woman wears - a woman with makeup will look more awake, more vital and even younger!  Yes, I am talking about facial skin-appropriate makeup, not heavily rouged cheeks and liver-red lips on someone who should wear more muted colors.  

Note that I did not say age-appropriate makeup.  There is no such thing as age-appropriate makeup; except makeup on a 12 year old, who should never, ever, never wear makeup, except some blush and sparkles and only at her Bat Mitzvah party!

I have said time and again: makeup is the art of accentuating and concealing.  Accentuate the features you love and conceal the features you love less. 

What you love:

• Create bright or dramatic eyes with dramatic eye shadows and eye liner if you love your eyes. 
• Create powerful lips with a dark and dramatic lip color if you love your lips.

What you love less:

• Create a soft eye look with muted earth-tone or blush colored eye shadow if you love your eyes less.
• Create barely-there-lips with soft muted lip treatments if you love your lips less.  Keep in mind that if your lips are very narrow or thin, you can create a fuller lip look by using a lip pencil to draw your lip line a bit past your natural line and the fill them in with a same color lipstick!
• Create warm, barely-there cheeks with a lightly dusted muted dusky-pink tone (stay away from harsh orange, red or brown tones) on your cheeks if your love your cheeks less.

What about you jewelry?

Don’t be afraid of your almost-final makeup look. Don'r worry about whether your eyes or lips look too dark.  The only way to really appreciate your finished makeup look is to see yourself fully dressed.  This means you must put on your dress, jewelry, wig or hat (if applicable).  Once you are fully dressed, don't just look in the mirror - take a picture to see how you look in the picture – this is what counts!

And while I am on the subject of pictures:  open your eyes a bit more than you are used to when you take pictures and please smile more than you usually do.  

Remember: A smile will light up your face and create a glow no makeup can accomplish – but makeup will give you a polished look that no smile can create or prolong!

Want to add a 'pop' to your eye makeup?  Consider false eye lashes.  A quality pair of lashes – not too long (no spider lashes!) or too thick – may not make too big a difference to your look "in person", but could make a difference to your appearance in the photographs!

Not sure of the look you want: ask your makeup artist for a trial beauty session; this session is not just for the bride!  Want to know more about a trial beauty session read my article: http:://yochieisner.blogspot.co.il/p/pre-wedding-trial-beauty-session.html

Now we need to talk about the why you don't want to wear makeup and many times that comes from a deeper place.  I truly believe every woman is born with a G-D given right to wear makeup, enjoy wearing makeup and a right to WANT to wear makeup.  I really feel that some women just feel they don't deserve to feel good about themselves or they don’t want people to think they are selfish or vain.  They feel that this is their daughter's/son's day and that the spot light should not be on them.  Or they are too old to bother with makeup or that they are "too far gone" and no amount of makeup can help them or why bother.  I am here to tell you - you could not be more wrong!

You deserve to feel good about yourself, to look into the mirror and not cringe, so that when you look into the camera lens you will not cringe, nor should you cringe when you see the photos.  And you certainly don't want your kids to cringe when they see the photos.

Like shoes, it doesn't matter if you feel overweight, poor, unhappy at work, unhappy in other areas of your life, your face can help make you feel good about yourself.  This is not silliness or selfishness, this is about feeling good about yourself, looking good and succeeding all bundled together into one package.  And let me tell you something, the photographer will treat you better and kinder and your kids will feel better as well! 

If your best friend won't tell you, then let me, YOU HAVE TO WEAR MAKEUP.  

Not happy about your hair?  Think about hair extensions or a less-expensive synthetic wig.  Not happy about your dress or your dress size?  Talk to a stylist and I work with the best Wendy Lehmann!  BUT, let the Kallah Whisperer tell you, if you feel good about your makeup and hair, you will stand taller, look thinner and make better pictures for your kids and grandkids.  

Oh now I brought out the big guns!  Imagine: your grandkids will one day look at the wedding pictures of their parents and see you there and they will say (say it with me) "what a sexy young grandmother I have".  Now, make that appointment with the makeup artist and hairstylist, you know you deserve it!

For more information on this topic and to arrange a bridal beauty consultation or bridal beauty trial session please contact me today.  Visit my site  www.thekallahwhisperer.com 

Did you enjoy my article?  I’d love to hear from you!  Drop me a line or tell me on my facebook page and please feel free to share my blog with a bride and all your friends!

Do you have any questions about Jewish wedding customs, please drop me a line?  Do you want to learn more about brides, weddings and beauty? Please subscribe to my blog. 

Prevent tangles and knots in long hair sheitels! Share with your friends!

One of the most annoying problems with long sheitels is the fact that the rows of hair that lay on the nape of the neck tend to get knotted and matted.  These rows of hair can be detangled - but like everything else - continuous combing loosens and then tears the hairs in the sheitel.  Eventually, over-vigorous brushing and combing will create bald spots.

The reason this area is so vulnerable to tangling is the fact that this area tends to rub along the collars of shirts, dresses, coats and jackets, as well as get caught in scarves and necklaces. There is no way to prevent this close contact, but there is a way to help prevent the resulting tangles!

For years I have told my customers that they should pay extra attention to this area and GENTLY detangle and comb - with a wide tooth comb or brush - this area after every time they wear their long sheitels.  Regular detangling keeps this area neat and prevents the need for more vigorous brushing when you bring your sheitel in for a 'wash and set'. (Another area of special attention is the “scalp” area of the wig, but that’s the subject of another article!) 

I have tried all kinds of methods to detangle the hairs as safely as possible, but like everything else, I have found that the easiest method is to PREVENT this tangling IN THE FIRST PLACE.  My solution is simple and wig-safe!

My method works great with all sheitels: on new sheitels as well as old sheitels; 100% human hair, blends and even synthetics! 

What to do?

þ First turn your sheitel inside out.  Hold the nape section of your sheitel facing you.  

þIf this is not a new sheitel, gently comb and detangle all the hair of the sheitel - paying special attention to the last rows of hair close to the edges of the sheitel (this is the area that will come in close contact with the nape of the neck). 

þ Take a small amount of silicone gel or Moroccan/Aragon oil and rub it into the palm of your hands.  The gel or oil will keep these rows of hair “lubricated” and loose and less likely to be able to get knotted or tangled. Rub this small amount into the palms of both hands.

þ Using the palms of your hands gently apply the gel/oil ONLY to the roots of the rows of hair at the nape.  Do not rub the oil/gel down through the hair length.  You only want the “roots” of the rows of hairs close to the nape to be affected. The reason for this is that you do not want your wig to dirty or create an oil stain on any of your clothes.

þ Once you have treated your wig, you should not need a wide-toothed comb or brush to untangle your wig hair after a day of wig wear.  You should be able to gently untangle this area with just your fingertips.  

þ This layer of protection should last until your regular month and a half shampoo and set session. If you have been wearing your wig in hot weather or throughout a particularly active day, you may need to reapply a bit of gel/oil and repeat the process.  If you wait months between shampoo and set sessions (which you know you should NOT DO!), the protective properties of the gel/oil will not last and you will need to reapply a bit of gel/oil every so often.

þ Before and after every wear, gently shake out your wig twice. Once while holding your wig inside out and then while holding your wig right side out.  This will help to keep the hairs separate.

Treat your wig with the love and attention it deserves and it should serve you well for a long time to come!

When should you begin looking for a makeup artist and hairstylist for YOUR Wedding?

One of the top items on your Bridal To Do List must be finding a professional makeup artist and hairstylist.  When should you being your search?  Aside from the obvious answer of "as soon as possible", I believe the optimal time is as soon as the wedding dress has been chosen.  The reasons behind this are 1) you will have a better feeling/understanding of your wedding look once you have chosen your gown and  2) even if you have been dreaming about, imagining and planning your wedding since you were five; choosing the gown somehow focuses you. Sometimes the gown you ultimately chose will be very different than the gown you imagined.  Always, alway keep in mind that your makeup and hairstyle must compliment and harmonize with your dress.  Your picture-perfect look includes everything you wear: your gown, jewelry, makeup, hair and veil.

Did you notice that I did not mention shoes?  I would just like to add that although I believe that shoes are one of the most important fashion choices any woman EVER makes; wedding shoes fall into one of only three categories: (1) ugly, comfortable and thank G-d no one sees them under my long wedding dress; (2) insanely high, gorgeous and murderous and what a shame no one sees them under my long wedding dress and finally (3) insanely high, gorgeous and they no longer kill me because I removed them thirty seconds after the chuppah.

 

A FEW WORDS ABOUT VEILS

I want to discuss veils.  Sometimes the choice of a veil is an afterthought; bought, borrowed or found sometime between picking out the dress and standing under the chuppah.  The most versatile veil is a "simple" veil made of layers (the number of layers is a personal choice) of lace and/or silk and attached with a comb with the tines facing in. 

Do not choose a veil that is permanently attached to a tiara or other hair accessory, as this type of veil drastically limits the type of hair style you will ultimately choose. 

If you chose to wear a tiara, you should be able to position the tiara on your head, regardless of where the veil is attached.

Order of work on the day of the wedding:

ü  Hairstyle

ü  Tiara (sometimes the tiara is positioned while the hairstyle is being created, as some of the hair may be combed/positioned to hide the tiara's clips and/or combs)

ü  Makeup

ü  Veil

A MONTH AND HALF BEFORE THE WEDDING…

By a month and a half before the wedding you should have selected your makeup artist and hairstylist and decided on your makeup and hairstyling choices.  This will give you enough time to let your hair grow, you brows grow in and give your skin a chance to improve.  Write it or insert it into your calendar:

MUST CLOSE HAIR AND MAKEUP BY ________________

HOW DO I CHOOSE MY MAKEUP AND HAIRSTYLE?

Remember:  Your wedding photos are meant to last a lifetime - this means your makeup and hairstyle must be timeless!  I always tell my brides that they should be able to look back on their wedding photos and at their wedding hair and makeup choices five, ten and even fifteen years from now without shaking their heads and saying "What was I thinking? ". 

This means that you should:

1)   Keep an open mind!  Look and explore the net and magazines for the latest hairstyle and makeup fashion choices.  Look at what your friends and family are wearing on "both sides of the pond".   If you Google "wedding hairstyles and makeup" you will get millions of results. You can narrow the search a bit by focusing on your hair length (long, short, curly, etc). 

2)   Do not be fooled by wonderful shots of hairstyles using models that have blonde hair with blonde highlights.  Blonde / blonde highlighted hair shows off just about any style and will nearly always look gorgeous.  The exact hairstyle on dark hair will look less wonderful, as the blonde highlights bring out the curves, curls and waves in the hairstyle.  Also keep in mind that lighting and Photoshop play a part in how the hairstyle is portrayed in photos.  This is why blonde hair is the most popular hair color to photograph for a hairstyle photo shoot. This does not mean you should dye your hair for the wedding; it just means you should be aware of this fact and manage your expectations accordingly.

3)   What styles appeal to you?  First of all: forget about your dress, your shoes, what hair colors and styles appeal to you.  (I know what I said at the beginning of this article) NOW what hair and makeup styles are the most flattering for your facial structure? 

Now let's put this all together: what appeals to you, what flatters you and what suits your wedding style. 

Now that you have an idea of what hair and makeup styles appeal to you – talk to your makeup and hair stylist.  Arrange for a Bridal Beauty Trial Session.   DO NOT SKIP this session!  This is the only opportunity you will have to try on and try out a variety of styles and decide – before the wedding – which you like best.  Take a trusted friend along with you.  A second opinion is vital here.  

Clear your schedule and make an appointment.  Take all the time you need.  This is not the time to rush or choose "whatever".  Be thoughtful and patient.  The effort and consideration you put into this session will be in direct proportion to your satisfaction with the final result on the day of the wedding!  Take pictures.  This session will also help you calculate the amount of time you will need to create your bridal look on your wedding day. 

Once you have chosen your makeup artist and hairstylist and the styles you want - you can check one more item off your To Do List!

TAKING CARE OF YOUR HAIR AFTER THE WEDDING

If you or anyone you know are planning a wedding and planning to have your hair styled (of course you WILL!), this article is for you!  PRINT AND SAVE THIS BLOGICLE – IT COULD SAVE THE HAIR OF A LOVED ONE!

You've planned every detail of your wedding; dreamt of your dress, hair and makeup since you were a little girl.  Then the big day comes and as you watch your 'every day' hair transformed into a "three-tiered confection", you begin to wonder how you will ever get your 'everyday' hair back on the day after the wedding. 

Brides are always asking me how they should take care of their hair immediately after the wedding, or more to the point, how can they remove the buckets of hairspray, kilos of hair pins, clips and accessories, and multiple rubber bands from their hair.  The answer is: carefully and with patience.  Remember it took many hours to create your wedding hairdo; it will take time to get your hair back to its natural state.

Begin the transforming process, by removing your wedding gown, jewelry and makeup. I warmly recommend that you begin the hair care process the night (should I say "the morning after") of your wedding. You may be exhausted, but on the other hand you may not be able to get any sleep with the mound of teased and tortured hair that is now perched on top of your head.

Begin by removing all the pins, hair accessories and extensions.  I always joke that the bride will be finding pins in her hair until her first anniversary, I exaggerate – but you may find those little sweeties in your hair for a good few days – especially if you have long hair or extensions. 

Work as methodically as you can: begin at the back of your head and remove anything that is not your hair! You can spray your hair with a mixture of warm water and conditioner, working this mixture in your hair from your scalp till the tips of your hair. 

While we are on the subject: Before the wedding, many brides allow their hair to grow long in order to ensure they have "long hair" for their bridal hairstyle.  Many times this long hair is just long lengths of split ends. Once the wedding is over, you should immediately make an appointment to have your hair trimmed!

For those brides reading this blogicle BEFORE the wedding, I warmly recommend that you begin considering your hair, optimum hair length and bridal hairstyle – before anything else.  Under the most favorable circumstances, you would have at least six months to plan your wedding.  Which for our purposes means you have six months to get a good cut/styling and then – depending on how quickly your hair grows – you should have micro-trims every six to eight weeks to keep your hair healthy. Contact me now for a FREE BRIDAL CONSULTATION!

Don't let anyone tell you differently; long split ends are not a substitute for long healthy hair and they do not enhance a bridal hairstyle. 

Back to AFTER the wedding:  Instead of spraying your hair with warm water and conditioner, you can lightly spray your hair with good quality hair oil, such as Moroccan oil, obliphica oil or even olive oil (!).  Massage the oil or conditioner/water mixture GENLTY into your hair. 

Then just as GENTLY begin to comb out the teasing, curling and spraying with a wide tooth comb and/or your fingers.  Beginning at the back of your head and working your way forward.  Work on loosening and separating the hairs a section at a time.  Do not rush!  Try not to tear apart sections of hair that are "glued together" with spray.  Gently separate the hairs.  Remember warm water and oil and patience should release almost every knot in your hair.   

There may be a section of hair that is just too knotted and you will just have to cut this one out! If you do this at home, cut as close to the top of the knot as you can.  Remember not all hair can be saved.

If you are too tired to take care of all your hair that night (morning), then spray with water and conditioner and wash your hair in warm water with a good quality shampoo.  Rinse out and then gently towel dry.  Begin to work on your hair as soon as possible the next day. 

Whether you begin this process right away or the next day, you should shampoo and rinse your hair several times (during the same "session") in order to wash out as much of the gunk and glue as you can.

Once your hair is basically tangle free, treat your hair to a good moisturizing hair mask.  You can do this at home or in a beauty salon.  If you are doing this at-home: shampoo and condition your hair as usual and then comb and detangle your hair and then apply a few good handfuls of hair mask.  The amount you use depends on the length and thickness of your hair. 

As always work methodically.   Apply the mask from the roots through to the tips, massaging your scalp GENTLY as you work.  I like to then wrap the hair in a towel and leave the mask on for 20-30 minutes.  Always read label directions before using any product! 

Relax with your new husband over a leisurely breakfast/brunch for two.  Once the mask setting time is completed, gently rinse out the mask and towel dry.  If you must blow dry, curl, straighten and in general torture your hair, please wait an hour or so, allowing your hair to enjoy the new found silkiness of the mask before beating it into submission again.  Your hair will love you for it!

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